How I went from being disabled and alone, to being adopted into God's family
My name is Michelle Mitchell, and this is my story.
"Destined to life alone," that's what I thought! I mean, really, who would want someone who could barely take care of herself much less anyone else? The uncertainty of health, the uncertainty of family, and the uncertainty of relationships riddled my growing up. It was not until I looked in the right direction that I found the peace, love, and hope I longed to receive.
I grew up as a person with a disability. My mom was a single parent, having to work most of her life in order to support the family. I have two brothers and one sister, none of which have been born with any physical limitations. My mother was married on and off; men came and went just as easily as the seasons. She only knew my father a short time, and he was gone before I was even born. I have no idea who he may be. I have no pictures. I have no connection to him.
In our house, love was based upon the physical supplying of needs. Those physical needs were met as quickly as possible. There was no time for anything else. As I looked around my world, I longed to be a part of everybody else's family. Anything, anywhere, anybody had to be better than this. My fantasies were my haven. It was there I had a father who loved me, protected me, and kept me safe. It was there I was loved, nurtured, and appreciated. It was there I belonged. Eventually, however, the fantasy had to end and reality took hold. Yelling, strife, and the threats of my mother wanting to kill herself was my reality. Another one of my mother's relationships was ending; another dad gone. Who might take his place next?
The pattern was inevitable: enjoy the "pseudo family" while it was here because soon it would not be. I craved a family that knew the definition of love, like the family you see down the block, on TV, or in the movies. Even though they were not reality, I just wanted to be protected to the point I could count on my family being there when I needed them through the trials of life. Many people thought my biggest challenge and difficulty was my disability, but more than that it was the loneliness I felt as I searched for life's meaning alone.
It was not until I was 14 years old that I realized things could be different. No, the reality of my family situation was not going to change; as a matter of fact, it was going to get worse. Instead, I was introduced to Someone who would never fail, who loved me, who accepted me as I was (even the things I did wrong), and was longing for me to be part of His family. That Someone was Jesus Christ. You see, I knew about Him from my years growing up in a Lutheran Church, but I never understood what He wanted for me.
By no accident, I was brought to a church that taught the truth about Jesus Christ and His plan to reconnect me to God. No wonder I felt alone, unprotected, and insecure; it was because I was not connected to my Heavenly Father. It took me several months to understand these truths, but God worked in my life to open my heart and show me that all I needed was Him to fill the void. God knows that void cannot be filled by man; men fail. So, in November of 1990, I admitted that my sin (the breaking of the laws of God) separated me from Him. I determined I did not want to purposefully do that anymore and my only chance to reconnect myself to God was by accepting, through faith, the gift that Jesus Christ gave on the cross.
The Bible says, He hath made us accepted in the beloved, in whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace. (Ephesians chapter 1, verses 6-7) God loved me so much that He gave His Son to reconcile the relationship I had broken. My search was over for the family I longed to have.
Not long after my decision, my family life changed for the worse, which removed me from the church that taught the truth. The negative influences in my life quickly dragged me away from some of the positive principles I learned. God's presence never left me though, as evidenced by the "adoptive family" He provided so I could receive the guidance I missed as a young child. This guidance would help to return me to Him in spirit and in truth once I was enrolled in college.
Growing in God's family and love has been a journey since my decision to allow Jesus Christ to reconnect me to my Heavenly Father. Everything has not been wonderful, but I do have a peace and security that I did not have before knowing Jesus. I belong to a Father who is always there, who loves me perfectly, and who promises to provide for my needs. He has definitely kept His promises and has changed my life! Jesus can do the same for you.
For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God: and if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together. For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. (Romans chapter 8, verses 15-18)